To defer or not to defer? Why Professional advice matters

By Laura Vida

As a former primary school teacher who has taught in England and Scotland, I know what a child learns in P1/Reception, both north and south of the border. I am also keenly aware of the social and emotional skills a child requires to thrive at school. However, I am also aware that I, my child’s mother, am possibly the least objective person in her life. 

Here’s what I’d do if still unsure about whether or not to defer my child.

1. Get advice from a professional  

In our case, we consulted the head at our child’s nursery. You need to find someone experienced who you trust and respect. Crucially, this should be someone who knows your child well, academically, socially and emotionally. They will be the best person to judge whether or not your child will have the tools to thrive in P1. Or, whether an extra year would give your child the chance to grow in ways that will help them thrive in P1, and, more importantly, afterwards.

2. Look at the whole child

Whether or not you defer should not be solely determined by your child’s literacy and numeracy levels. It’s important to look at the whole child. It is not uncommon for a child to be deferred even though their reading and numeracy is well ahead of their peers at nursery. Similarly, a child’s height should not determine when they go to school.  

3. Consider my child’s friendships

Take your child’s friendships into account. But don’t make them the deciding factor.  With whom does your child prefer to play? It’s also worth speaking to nursery practitioners about this as they will have a more nuanced view. In our case, I thought my child’s friends tended to be the same age or older. But her head of nursery gave me a more nuanced picture. 

4. Think about my child’s needs

Do you have any serious concerns about your child? Does nursery think you child could qualify for additional support for learning, now, or at school? If so, it’s really important that you get a diagnosis a.s.a.p. You want the support to be in place when your child starts school. State schools in Scotland are understaffed, if anything, so don’t assume 1:1 support will always be there for anyone when needed. Furthermore, the waiting list for support is likely to be longer if you wait until your child is at school before applying. For children with additional needs, an extra year in a good nursery can help them build up the skills they will need for school, whether academic, social or emotional. 

5. Think about my ultimate goal for my child

Remember that the purpose of all education is to set a child up for life. Yes, your deferred child might end up coasting a little in P1 and P2. However, they will be more mature when it comes to taking exams later on, during freshers week, or when choosing a first career. However, there are, of course, many kids for whom deferral makes no sense. If you think your kid is ready, and the professionals agree, you’ve got nothing to lose. 

Common questions: 

1. Do I really want my child to be one of the oldest?

A child will learn lots from older children. That’s true. However, as John C. Maxwell famously noted: “You never really know something until you teach it to someone else.” An able, deferred child will thus have different educational opportunities. 

2. Will I regret it?

It’s commonly said that nobody regrets deferring. And while this may not be 100% true, it does, generally, seem to be the case. Certainly, more people regret not deferring. The worst story I have heard is that a child was ‘overconfident’ or ‘obnoxious’ when deferred. But there is no evidence, in this case, that deferral was the prime reason for the child’s behaviour. I suspect most people would prefer an overconfident rather than an under confident child. A lack of confidence often restricts a child’s ability to explore, intellectually, socially or otherwise.